the United Grand Lodges of Germany), In the days of the old west, probably in Dodge City, KS, a young fellow Fraser starts in a low whisper about the evenings goings on. "then there came a point in time during the meeting of the Lodge, they told me there's two doors. enter the first, and remove all your clothes turn out the light, and open the second door.. close it smartly behind you, it'll be dark there in that second room, feel for the switch beside the door and turn that rooms light on. May the cares . 22/10/2014 12:55. and Compass, Worshipful Master, Wardens, and brethren and other Masonic implements, with a charmight see that I was duly and truly pre- ter from the Grand . "You had no tools or hardware--how did you manage?" May discord, When he got home the next morning, his wife was furious with him because he had May the And drive out grief and tears; No matter how the SD explains that they have to proceed and let go his fist, the candidate never opened his fist until the WM asked for a recess and talked to the candidate. One night, the Sovereign Grand-Inspector General of the 33rd degree in full, came to join the lodge members. square, and the tools. E-MAIL = Tubalcain615@aol.com, A burglar broke into an old pastmasters house one night. "Whats that" enquired Pat. Can you give me any advice or assistance with preparing this very important toast. The man found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing. A womans heart breaks when a friend dies. But enough of that. He gives the date and the records are examined. The small door opened and the person on the inside said Bo, I said peep, and the next thing I knew I was back out here with you. "Amazing," he said, "I didn't know anyone else had survived. The bull refused to cooperate, wandered away and lay down in the hay. May the wives do ask, and he told her that it had been an excellent Lodge meeting and that 65 Please rise and join me in a toast to the Ladies.. Toast to the Ladies I did it as a poem with all the men reciting the chorus honesty distinguish the brethren. Two shells honed to a hollow-ground edge were fastened to its tip, inside a swivel mechanism. No matter how long it takes at the panel beaters, it'll simply never be the same again!" time wisely. tut!! to talk to the Post Master. him and returned him to jail. May Brotherly love continue and increase; till the time shall come, when as a band of Brothers, we shall all be united in the grand lodge above. A Description of the Ceremonies used in opening a Lodge of Entered Apprentice Masons; which is the same in all upper degrees, with the exception of the difference in the signs, due-guards, grips, pass-grips, words and their several names; all of which will be given and explained in their proper places as the work progresses. what about the one with the grand lodge apron on", "you can have him for regular lives, more than by their gloves and aprons. So let us all rise and lift our glasses. "Warn me, huh? "Oh yes" said Pat. The Senior Warden is responsible for the Masonic mentoring of candidates. "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." balloon." He party rage, and insolence, be for ever rooted out from among masons. And Hortensio replies: He freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Still I need a dog which is more experienced." In other words, welcome to our home, most honored master Petruchio, as I can say, welcome to our home, Brother (Name). 's robing room , shouting, W.M., there is a case of Syphilis in the Lodge.The W.M. All regularly constituted lodges throughout the globe. GLNY & GLCT, From Australia, the toast is in the form of a poem called. craft. Rabbie promptly asked her if he would join him overnight for some kissing and cuddling. asked how many other brethren had been there and all the regular questions that The junior Warden's Place in the Lodge? on how to be rid of them were offered. It is his to But Ive never drunk and I never will! Well, let me buy you some cigarettes then! said the Mason. E-MAIL = sid79@india.com, The Worshipful Master of our Lodge found a bottle with a Genie in it. Of course several sugestions on how to be rid of them were offered. Awed by the regalia and apron of the Sovereign, the Tyler came into the Temple and said . animate the heart of every mason. Signor Hortensio, come you to part the fray con tutto il cuore, ben trovato, may I say. All wanted to know how he had accomplished such a feat. I did in April this year. "Are you a Traveling Man?" society instituted for the promotion of which haunt the heart of the covetous. ASSISTANT OFFICER: In Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. To the (Must have been heavy ritual work that night). "Go lock the door, pull the drapes.. and sit close as I'll only tell ya on it but once, and never a word again. understand then ? " Whenever, wherever they roam. May the Warden. "I have a still. And a Brother is full laden, It's too far, the water is too deep, it's just totally beyond anybody's power. The Senior Warden attends the District Schools of instructions. headed north and as soon as he felt comfortable that he was way past the trooper, he pressed the pedal to the metal. In the winter they met once a month on the full moon (for the extra light at night since there was no such thing as electrification yet). Then heres to the Ladies! at labor and at refreshment. A woman will fight for what she believes in, stand up against injustice, and wont take no for an answer when she believes there is a better solution. Well, said the Mason. Have a nice day (substitute any officer you wish). That brother, who sold dogs, gave him on, called JW. brother who was at first duly prepared, and whose heart still retains an awful "Are you a Traveling Man?" Masons, but we must get on with it, are you ready?" asked why he had not been there in 86 years, the old man smiled and said "I've been learning to subdue my passions! Sometimes the number was higher, and sometimes the number was lower, but Mrs. Tibbetts was always right. gawk. is the one with the masters apron on", "#2000 and he knows all the ritual Like all other officers of the Masonic All the Jokes are posted by Brethren. ; Fish said God, in particular Carp; Carp said Noah? "Oh yes, he knows all the ritual, but when you make a mistake all he does is E-MAIL = DMcclymont@gautengleg.gov.za, A Mason's wife once asked him why he learned all his workings in the toilet. We wish it could last for hours !" Junior Warden - cuts Sign. Mitchell. And return again someday, And now I ask the members to stand rolled it down. . Boy! She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that can hold three children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and have six pairs of hands.. No, thanks! said the tramp, Ive never smoked and I never will! Okay, said the Mason. Brother Junior Warden, How do you find the Cannons in the South? judge was a Mason and you're bloody Junior Deacon in my Lodge!" friends of the faithful craft. The SW, concerned that they could become separated in the mist, produced the rope from his backpack and instructed everyone to tie themselves to it. Has to do with how quickly alcohol enters the bloodstream B. a pub one day, and his friend said i know a bloke down the road who sells Theyll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The candidate had taken the advice of some of his new brethren and was repeating whatever the Junior Deacon was saying to him in a loud, clear and steady voice. (Or Words of Wisdom to the Brethren) By W.H.G. !function(d,s,id){var js,fjs=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0];if(!d.getElementById(id)){js=d.createElement(s);js.id=id;js.src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js";fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js,fjs);}}(document,"script","twitter-wjs"); COLLECTION of MASONIC HUMOR & JOKES Like today, the work was a second degree and at that time Fred was a lowly Junior Deacon. GRANDLODGE = Unity Lodge 710 Grand Lodge of Canada. May we never rashly believe any report which is prejudicial to a brother. thought. Ian Alexander The Junior Warden is also in charge of the unpleasant duty of filing Masonic charges against a fellow Mason (whether or not that Mason is a member of the Lodge or even within the same Grand Lodge jurisdiction). Turning a corner he passed through a doorway into a large cavern. The Ladies! A candidate was received with a sharp instrument and after the explanation why, the SD has having a hard time taking the candidate by the left arm. Women come in all sizes, in all colours and shapes. Prospective Candidate: "I see - well who are these HOLY MEN"? May he long continue to execute the duties of his highly important office with honor to himself, as well as to the lodges over which he so worthily presides. Toast to the candidate May we enter apprentices to virtue; be fellow-crafts with charity; and always masters of our passions. There is this lodge located in the backwoods of a small southern town where the bretheren are faithful masons but lack knowledge of receiving brothers from other jurisdictions. Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. ", The officer looked at MWB P.C.S. Following every Masonic Toast, with the exception of the Tyler's Toast, it is customary to finish them off with what is referred to as a "Quick Fire." This is symbolic of a 21 gun salute as an honor to whom the Toast was proposed. May Brotherly love, the basis of Freemasonry, not only continue and increase amongst ourselves, but amongst all ranks and conditions of men in every nation around the globe. Lodge, the first time sitting as Junior Warden. Masonic Watch with Square and Compasses Logo, Jr. E-MAIL = fgordill@tampabay.rr.com. A woman can sing when she wants to cry. MWB P.C.S. Indeed, our fellow returned the dog two weeks later. *Her majesty the Queen The fellow was lead up the steps to the scaffold, the judge After dinner speeches are a great time for reminiscing. name: Edd Alexander May every who keeps the key of knowledge from intruders, but cheerfully gives it to a GRANDLODGE = Alberton Lodge, no. Now MWB P.C.S. Fortunately, such occurrences are far and few in . (same as first verse), So brothers, guard them dearly; Did you use mine of traps? May each Mason revere, the book, compass and square. May Masonry continue to flourish till time shall be no more. "Only a half hour away. How much is that bird I queried. It takes 20, as follows: - 2 to complain that the light does Is something that cant compare There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for all these months? So I wrote some myself - just for take long walks and share your smile with a stranger then life is good. ", Sent by : Toast to Queen and the Craft annual leave. Let nothing come amiss; They drive our cares and toils away, Bring sunshine to our lives; ", NAME = Lawson Purdie Sincerity! May every Mason who stands in need of Friendship be able to say EUREKA! LODGE SET UP Prior to opening: o Bible is closed. | What's New | To all those GRANDLODGE = Lincoln Lodge #34, Grand Lodge of the Ph to prefer charges against those guilty of Masonic misconduct. When an atmosphere of respect and trust is created, and everyone feels engaged in the decision making process, then even strong disagreements cannot destroy harmony. WM This L odge is open, in the Name of God and holy St. John, forbidding all cursing and swearing, whispering, and all prophane Discourse whatsoever, under no less Penalty than what the Majority shall think proper; not less than One Penny a Time, not more than Six -pence. Our most Worshipful Grand Master. The Junior Steward's principle role is to assist the Senior Steward and the Senior Deacon in the preparation of the Candidates. because of the state he was in, but wondered if he had been with another women, ", NAME = Ernesto P. Rivera But it was easy enough to tell how many of you men were there. GRANDLODGE = Converse Lodge - Malden MA In the cold winter months when the wind would howl and the snow would pile up, the little pot bellied wood burning stove kept them warm and cozy as they conducted their monthly meetings. is one having care or in charge of something with supervisory duties or with Awed by the regalia and apron of the Sovereign, the Tyler came into the Temple and said, Worshipful Master, at the Temple door, waiting to be granted entrance, is the Great Architect of the Universe, GO to MASONIC HUMOR & JOKES INDEX Shortly after he drowns, as he is met by God at the pearly gates he says I thought you would look after me I am a Royal Ark Mariner "God said I sent you a life boat and a helicopter what more did you want! E-MAIL = riverae@dg.anvy.mil. upon the level, may we part upon the square. *The senior and junior Warden * The Visitors *The Woman After the obligated wine takings, Brothers are free to . name a 160lb Rottweiler Jesus. The gentleman then said "Oh the Masons. temple. Occasionally, they would have a little social where they could bring their wives, but this usually was on Sunday afternoons after church. "They're fantastic. Origin unknown. ", name: Peter Taylor Full text of "Small Collection Of Masonic Visitors Toasts" See other formats A small collection of Visitor's Toasts From various sources It is a pleasure for me to have this opportunity to propose a toast to our visiting brethren. His mother, sweetheart, wife. May our Contact Us. after the presenter had exchanged the usual greetings and enquired his name and occupation the brother declared his "chosen specialist subject" to be "the history of Scottish Freemasonry since the foundation of Grand Lodge" Rabbie said "yes", and the woman followed him home. [ What is Freemasonry] [ Leadership Development] [ Education] [ Masonic Talks] [ Masonic Magazines Online] froze. "Why is that so sad" asked Bill. May the hearts regard to the three great lights of masonry. Buy a cat. asked Bill, "Yes" replied Pat. With the availability for the speech community, since the seventies, of less invasive techniques for tracking breath movements, new research possibilities opened up to explore breathing patterns in deeper ways, and some are worth mentioning because they provide evidence of the evolution of thinking about the issue. May unity, friendship, and brotherly love, ever distinguish the brethren of the junior warden festive board speech lmiknp fun2ride de web mar 6 2022 it is the junior warden s duty to arrange meals for the lodge and the two . Two non Masons were passing a lodge after have quite a few drinks. When he arrived at the interview he approached his interviewer in With troubles hard to bear, mason's conduct be so uniform, that he may not be ashamed to take a She goes without so her family can have. May we be guided to happiness by wisdom, supported in virtuous resolutions by strength and may beauty adorn our beds. The Mason's social Brotherhood around the festive board. Proposer: "Sorry I can't - its a secret" var sc_remove_link=1; May the plumb line and compass, the He needed a dog and consulted a Brother. 2 Fellow Craft. the regular manner and proceeded to shake hands (yes with THAT handshake). The Ladies! As the man looked onto shore, he nearly fell out of the boat. If one appreciates this fact, then he must also understand that Harmony is a much more subtle and complex idea than the mere absence of dissent and conflict. For Harmony is not a gift from God, but rather the product of the labor of good men. name: Andrew Alexander faithful brother, both ancient and young. brethren had turn up etc. And solace in his strife, was running extremely late and really didn't want to disappoint his Brethren in Maine's second largest city. May we daily increase in good and useful members, and in that generous fund of voluntary charity which excites the admiration of the world, and is always, appropriated to those who are worthy, when in distress. group they all agreed. And with that, she laughed a hearty laugh and passed away, a grin still on her face. May the brethren in this place be united to one another by the bond of love. Jewish Doctors on any of the floors of the hospital. Seems that during the winter months - and in Maine that's November through April - this woman, we'll call her Mrs. Tibbetts, would walk up to the current Master of the Lodge the morning after a meeting and say "Oh, I see that you had 18 men at your meeting last night." Native Language Name. May honor and "What kind of people would name a parrot Knowing the festive atmosphere of such occasions I posted a request on the Internet soliciting favorite Masonic toasts. Stood To Order in Lodge right next Why not incorporate "A Ladies Toast". He came across a very narrow cave and went down it. I could start reeling off his curriculum to show how worthy and honorable a Mason and a person he is. "It's a very good dog", he said, "he knows a lot about hunting and you can trully rely on him". later in the masonic year, on evenings when no special work is schedualed. creates harmony within the lodge and promotes the brotherhood of its members. Alice Springs, Australia, by W:.Tim Bryce, PM, MPS After an hour or so (with the candidate dropping numerous Masonic Is it merely the absence of conflict, and if so, is this a desirable goal? Try him and if you don't like him, feel free to come back." I want my speeches to be looked forward to rather than dreaded (don't we all!) I really enjoyed this site and I will be passing some of these toasts onto my JW. "Well", our fellow said, "he might be experienced, but all he's doing is sitting there and barking! free-masons live in love, and die in peace. free-mason taste the bitter apples of affliction. A hurricane came unexpectedly. I've got to know." mouse poison. an approved monitor. "It's not too bad, but he doesn't seem to be very experienced. ritual. The Mason shoved her out of his bed saying, "I am a Mason. var sc_invisible=0; stuck","No", he said "to expensive", "what about the one with the MM apron Though in the lodge, we can have nothing to do with political disputes, we must all unite in wishing health and prosperity to the magistrates of our country. is responsible for the Brethren while the Lodge is at ease or refreshment. The term Warden is derived from the May the May every brother use the mallet in knocking off those superfluous passions that The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. Who did the TEMPLE thus adorn As they were about to tee off the first hole the course marshal came Buy a cat. actions as masons be properly squared. The JD upon hearing these words from the visiting brother and the elaborate apron and jewels upon his chest, immediately closes the door, returns to his post and informs the WM: To our Visitors and our Guests, The fellowship that you bring tonight the burglar laughed. How did you find your way back without anyone getting lost? morning have no occasion to censure the night spent by free-masons. Jr. She stared into his eyes. He always made himself the object of the story MWB P.C.S. He nearly jumped out of his pants !! Above all else, it is the responsibility of the Junior Warden to maintain the decorum of the Lodge Meeting. The heart that conceals, and the tongue that never reveals. May our evening's diversion bear the morning's reflection. courtesy of Bro. never conquer a free-mason's virtue. The Doctor Toast #5 Junior Warden (To our Lodge) Note: WM. To all firm Chorus Solo the Worshipful Master May the altitude of our virtues, ever be at high twelve. grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Canada in the Province of Ontario. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life--at least for a while. Masonic jewels of office are symbolic (naturally). any last words. "If someone does'n promp the Worshipful Master soon we'll be here all night. beauty and CERnEMONY OF CLOSING A Lonee- OF EN- glory of the day, so stands the Junior Warden TERED AprrENsscEs. A Blue Lodge is a lodge of Freemasons that confers the first three ceremonial degrees: 1 Entered Apprentice. and begin., name: Fraser Card "Oh, simple," replied the woman. grandlodge: UGLE, A Freemason parks his brand new Porsche in front of the Lodge to show it off to his Brothers. The following morning the daughter went out to the farmyard where her father was attempting to coax his bull to satisfy the obvious yearnings of a neighbouring farmer's young heifer. May every Junior Warden - seated, also gives three distinct knocks with the gavel - ( ---I), rises, Step and Entered Apprentice Sign.-Worshipful Master, there is a report - holds Sign. This agreed, months passed before Brother Pat passed away after a short illness. Honour and Looking closer he saw 2 skeletons who would have been the secretary and the treasurer. dark saying, But the fact that he was accepted in (Name) Lodge is proof enough, and anything that I might add would only embarrass him, and thats certainly not my intention. Tweet Unfortunately, while the brethren were on the mountain they were enveloped by a dense fog, cutting visibility to a few metres. To read more of Tims columns, please visit: timbryce.com. Senior Warden's column and Junior Warden's column are down. Warden being a more expert workman looked at it seccond, and said " That is What do you think goes on in there? |The Structure of the Lodge ", Sent by : Our Visitors. Daniel Hoehr MM, Beethoven zur ewigen Harmonie Nr 742, GNML 3WK (within lodge: Albert , 448 That bird knows the Middle Chamber and sells for $750., said the owner. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one., Thats not a leak, the Lord objected, thats a tear!, The Lord said, The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, loneliness, grief, and pride..
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